Unity Home Theater System

Unity Home Theater System

A TV Setup You Can Get In2

As the long line of polo champions in your family proves, the Apple indeed does not fall far from the tree. So it should come as no surprise that a former Apple engineer, Tod Beauchamp, along with a Sony engineering exec Mike Fidler, are redefining the home theatre, much like Apple redefined…well, pretty much everything. Introducing the Unity All-In-One Home Theater System by In2technologies. It’s designed to combine high-quality sound and picture with a consumer-friendly setup that’s so easy it should take under 15 minutes. It features a DVD/Blu-ray player, iPad/iPhone dock, and the TV stand itself is comprised of a left, right, and center speaker, in addition to dual subwoofers. All you need is a single HDMI cable to connect it to your flat screen, and poof! Technology at its finest. Gather dad and grandpa around—the polo classic is about to begin.

The Perfect Jazz Collection

The Perfect Jazz Collection

Cue The Hi-Hat

Jazz Hands—much like jalapeños, hair product, and crying to get what you want—are to be used sparingly. But The Perfect Jazz Collection ($41.00) is something you can never get enough of, especially in the company of the ladies. This 25 CD box set collection has the original recordings of every jazz master to ever grace a smoky stage, from Louis Armstrong to Billie Holiday, Miles Davis, Chet Baker, the Thelonius Monk Quartet, Nina Simone, Herbie Hancock and Charlie Parker, plus many, many more. Bust out your porkpie hat, and put on your toe-tapping shoes—it’s getting very cool in here.

Converse One Star Super Mario Bros

Converse One Star Super Mario Bros. OX

The Mushroom Kingdom Kicks

Gamers and cool kicks go hand in hand like the peanut butter and jelly in a Candwich, and leave it to Converse Japan to marry the two together with style. The Converse One Star Super Mario Bros. OX  pay tribute to those tiny, mustached, turtle-stomping, brick-breaking, overall-wearing little buggers we all know and love—Mario and Luigi. The One Star of Converse and the Mario Bros. star do indeed seem to be a match made in heaven, with a yellow star appearing on the side of both the white and black leather versions of the shoe. Critters from the video game can also be found lurking on the sides, at the heel and on the insole. Wait ‘til Princess Toadstool gets a load of these.

Gumpert Apollo Enraged

Gumpert Apollo Enraged

Weird Name. Cool Car.

Much like the covert ops of some of your top assignments (Meow-Cat Eraserface, Kentucky Friend Wombat, Cheesy Poof McGraw—if you told anyone what they mean, you’d have to kill them), the name Gumpert Apollo Enraged gives the unsuspecting outsider no clue as to exactly how special, awesome and exciting it really is. Unveiled at the 82nd Geneva International Motor Show, German automaker Gumpert has put out a purebred racecar, with an Audi-sourced, supercharged 4.2-liter V8 touting 760 hp of pure, hot muscle—the most powerful street-legal car ever to peel out of its factory showroom. With its gull-wing doors, F1-style airbox, an air lift system, LED daytime running lights, and aluminum alloy wheels with center-locking and Michelin Pilot Super Sport tires, the Apollo Enraged waits for no man, woman or rocket launcher. Perhaps it might even come in handy on Operation Foxstep Tango Bunsen Burner…

Escargot Vacuum

Escargot Vacuum

Die Dust Bunnies, Die!

To a woman, there’s nothing more sexy than a man who can really clean. Aside from prancing around in a French Maid’s costume (you only did that once and destroyed all evidence…you’re pretty sure), the next sexiest thing you could whip out is the Escargot Vacuum ($130) from Toshiba. Smaller than a basketball, this little powerhouse not only packs 40% more air-wattage than a Dyson handheld, it’s also quieter than a hairdryer, and is compact enough to hide away in even the tiniest of corners. So go ahead. Suck those dust bunnies into oblivion and give Chloe a nice little show.