Packed For Adventure
As a regular jetsetting road warrior, you’re used to getting attention from fellow travelers. “How does his hair do that?” “Is that Miss October on his arm?” “Where is he going with that large crate of live reptiles?” The Indiana Leather Adventure Duffel ($345), while making your travels easier, will only add to the mystique. Outfitted with an expanding hard case, an enclosed bottom section for shoes, and a classic open up duffel area on top for clothes make it ripe for adventure. Just don’t get carried away and pack your whips. That’s asking for a date with TSA.
Since your time is precious and usually billable, you don’t normally engage in many “Do it Yourself” projects. But if the shower should start leaking and your Scary Shower Curtain isn’t to blame, you may need to put in some elbow grease to solve the problem. GE Caulk Singles ($58.00) will come in handy for a quick fix. The single serve pouches don’t require a caulking gun and are available in three different varieties: waterproof silicon clear (for colored surfaces), waterproof silicon white (for white surfaces), and paintable acrylic (for paintable seals). Stash a few under your sink and you’ll be prepared for whatever the caulk happens.
90 Never Looked So Good.
Like your grandpa’s no-pants rule demonstrates, when you’ve been around for 90 years, you can pretty much do whatever you damn well please, which is why we’re excited that Italian Motorcycle maker Moto Guzzi decided to celebrate their birthday with a Limited Edition 2012 Moto Guzi California 90 ($16,000). The California nameplate that epitomized the Italian cruisers for the last 40 year comes equipped with a 90-degree V-Twin engine, 74 HP and 69 pound feet of torque. It pays homage to its classic heritage with orange and white paint, cowhide saddle, and a 1930’s style tank logo. Buy one and take your gramps for a joy ride, just be sure to Clorox the seat afterwards.
Chocolate Is A Man’s Best Friend
You were first introduced to the Maca root during your quest for enlightenment in the Andes Mountains. The local chief, who served as your guide, boasted of its many benefits like stamina and sexual potency. You didn’t doubt the husband of 12 satisfied wives and father to 23 children then, which is why you shouldn’t be surprised now to find it as one of the main ingredients in the new Aphrodisia Bar ($8.50) from chocolate maker Gnosis. Maca is just one of many sensuality-enhancement ingredients like horny goat weed, Fo Ti, Don Quai, Palm nectar, figs and Cacao combine to make up the aphrodisiac chocolate bar. Offer one to the lady next time she’s got a headache and let the ancient herbs do their magic.
If the infinity pool is good enough for your second home then surely it’s good enough for your fish. A ZeroEdge Aquarium is designed without a lid so that the water spills over the sides creating a “zero edge.” The overflow collects along the perimeter drain channel and gets pumped back up into the tank. While it creates a stunning conversation piece, it might get a little dicey if Whiskers starts using it as an endless buffet. So we advise you keep the Beta and the Bengal at different houses.
Between your incognito profession, fraternizing with racy women, and wealth of gadgetry (Sony Wrist Computer) you’re a regular Dick Tracy. While everything you say may not live in quotes yet (your auto-biography is being penned as we speak), your comic book collection can. The Comic Shelf ($250) is inspired by the classic comic text graphic and is crafted from walnut veneer and MDF. Mount it on the wall to bring comic strip nostalgia to any space. You can house your Dick Tracy originals in it until your book gets published.
Have you ever tuned into Stern’s broadcast half way through a Carmen Electra interview and wished you could rewind? Now you can. The SiriusXM Lynx ($250+) is the new TIVO of radio. It gives subscribers the control to listen to what they want, when they want, which is pretty much the only way you operate. Lynx comes stacked with features that let you customize your listening experience like Tune Start that automatically starts a song from the beginning, Radio Replays that records up to 200 hours of programming, Start Now which allows you to go back 5 hours to listen to previously broadcast programming, as well as the fundamental Pause, Rewind and Replay features. So now you won’t miss Carmen’s answer to that incredibly inappropriate yet completely fascinating question from Howard.
Sports Fan Meets Film Maker
As a sports fanatic, you’ve been watching ESPN for as long as you can remember. All of your major milestones are date stamped by who was playing or getting traded that day (Gretzky moving to LA just about ruined your first day of second grade). Even your memories play back in your mind like a highlight reel with Greg Gumbel voiceover, which is why you’ll savor the ESPN Films: 30 for 30 Collector Set ($66.00). The 6-disc Blue Ray collection features 30 of the greatest, most compelling and controversial stories in sports from the past 30 years. ESPN commissioned 30 different directors to tell the stories they cared about, and the result is an unprecedented documentary film series that will move even the most jaded fan. Even if you’ve never heard of Tim Richmond’s demise from AIDS or the wasted talent of Marcus Dupree, you won’t regret a minute spent watching them. If only you would have returned Spike Jonz’s call last year, maybe yours would have been included as well.
The Boy In The Plastic Bubble
While you may not suffer certain death by being exposed to the elements, who (besides Bear Grylls) likes to sleep in the dirt with mosquitos nipping at your nose? Now you can experience all the sights and sounds of nature from the comfort of the Cristal Bubble ($12,000). The temporary dome shelter is made from clear reinforced plastic that provides 360-degree views of the surrounding area. It measures 13ft in diameter and can be deflated and stowed in a bag when not in use. A built in blower provides the necessary air to maintain the bubble shape and bring in fresh air sans dirt, bugs or allergens. The adjoining entryway acts like a mudroom where you can keep your dirty shoes or equipment from defiling your bubble sanctuary. If you want to take the experience even further, the set includes a modular wooden floor that can be separated into 10 pieces for easy portability. All in all, we’re pretty sure Mr. Travolta would approve.
Some Like It Hot
You like your showers like you like the women you share them with… HOT. The Kohler DTV Prompt Showering System ($173) allows you to select your water temperature precisely to keep you both happy. It’s a wall-mounted electronic shower remote with four simple touch controls. A warm up mode that starts heating up the shower before you get in, a pause button that allows you to save water while you shave or make whoopie, a digital temperature control, and diverter control that allows you to toggle between water outlets. It also features a digital clock with an available countdown timer for the guest who’s worn out her welcome. But with the type of women that frequent your bathroom we can’t imagine you wanting to end anything prematurely.